Love Novel 34

Mother’s home when I get there.
I can tell, firstly because the door is unlocked. Secondly, because she’s singing loud from the other side of the house with
music blasting from he t.v.
My stomach drops.
She hasn’t done that since before dad and Alex passed away. I drop my bag on the couch and hesitantly make my way
through the hallway down to her room at the end of the house
“Mother?”
There’s a pause in her singing and then the music stops, bathing the house in an uncomfortable silence. I steel my
stomach, preparing myself for a barge of hateful words to spew from her mouth.
The door to her room whips open and she smiles at me, wide.
Her lips have remnants of last’s night red lipstick, and her mascara runs down her face. “Alina, did school get out early?”
I frown. She’s muttering, her lips wrapping around an unlit cigarette and I find myself in shock that she isn’t actively
smoking.
“I wasn’t aware that you knew what time my school day ended.”
She rolls her eyes. “Serioulsy, Alina. Are you always so dreadful?”
I flinch, watching her as she turns from me, in her blue robe, leaving the door open. She’s going through her closet,
throwing clothes across her dirty room as she whispers to herself.
My lips twist between my teeth and I wonder if I want an answer to the question I’m asking. “What are you doing?”
“I met someone.”
Immediately, I want to cry. “You…met someone?”
She presses a dress to her front as she looks at herself in the mirror. “Yes. I think… I think he could make me happy.”
My ears ring and my vision turns blurry. “No.”
She drops the dress onto the bed. “Did you expect me to be single for the rest of my life?”
Yes. I did. I will have to be fatherless for the rest of my life, why should it be any different for her?
I shake my head, though. “No, it’s just… it’s so soon.”
She waves her hands through the air before bringing them up to her tangled hair. “I haven’t moved on. This isn’t about
love. He has money. He’s a father. He could take care of us.”
That does little to stop the wave of discomfort fluttering through me. “No.”
“I wasn’t asking for your opinion, Alina.”
“You just met him.”
“Yes, and?”
“You’re talking about him taking care of us, of marrying him.”
“Yes.”
I shake my head, wondering why she’s acting like this is the most normal thing in the world. “You can’t be serious?”
Her shoulders tense and whatever calm she was holding onto disappears. Her face distorts into a scowl and she steps
forward as she points a finger at me. “Fuck you.”
I flinch, taking a step back.
“You don’t question me.”
My cheeks heat and I shake my head, still not knowing how to deal with her when she turns angry so fast.
“You’re lucky I still provide for you, that you have a roof over your head and I don’t kick you out of here.”
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I wrap my arms around myself, but I hold my ground. “I’m your daughter.”
She scoffs. “More like a curse. If you had never been born, your father and Alex would still be here.”
She shuts the door with a force that has my hair flying across my face. The words coming from her don’t hurt as much as
they should because they are the same words I repeat to myself in my darkest moments. I blame myself every second of
every day.
Survivor’s guilt holds me in its tight fist.
Mother’s words are nothing compared to the things I tell myself in the mirror.
I exhale, having been holding my breath this entire time and turn to make my way to my room.
I hold a scream in when I bump into a chest.
Aiden.
He places his hands on my shoulders and looks down at me with a concerned frown. “Are you okay?”
I blink at him. “What are you doing here?”
He nods back to the living room. “Your front door was open, so I let myself in.”
I look over his shoulder to where my bag sits on the floor. His hands drop from my shoulders to my waist and he leans
over until he grabs my attention again.
“Are you okay?”
I nod, quickly wiping the tears from my face.
“Does she always talk to you like that?”
I shrug, “Doesn’t matter.”
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“Alina-”
I don’t let him talk. I take his hand and lead him to my room, shutting the door and twisting the lock to ensure we’re
alone. With our fingers intertwined, I lead him to my bed, where he sits on the edge and studies my face as I settle
between his legs and lean against his chest.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I whisper.
He nods against my head, kissing my forehead. “We don’t have to talk.”
I kiss his chest, through his shirt and his fingers flex against my waist. “Good.”
I lift my chin, kissing his throat, his neck, anywhere I can get in contact with him. He moans in his chest, his fingers
flexing, dropping to my ass as he lifts me and places me on his lap, my legs straddling his waist.
My lips find his quickly and I don’t even wait for him to respond, I immediately explore his mouth with my tongue, my
stomach twisting with the realization that I’m taking control.
“Fuck, Alina,” He mutters, eyes widening as I pull away long enough to push him down on the bed.
I grind on him over his jeans, my breath fluttering as the ache between my legs comes to life. I lean over, capturing his
lips between my teeth as I unabashedly twist and swing my hips over him His jaw clenches, his fingers digging into my
skin.
“Alina.”
There’s a hunger in his voice and it drives me. I sit up straight, pulling off my shirt, my bra and I lift myself for a second,
love enough to take off my shorts. When I’m naked, I drop myself back on top of his jeans, capturing his lips with mine
once more.
He doesn’t protest, doesn’t try to take control.
He just lets me kiss him, his hands gripping my ass, his fingers brushing my pussy. I revel in the shudder that passes
through me and I reach between us, pushing his pants down and gripping is already hard length.
His breath catches in his throat, hissing even while I’m still kissing him. I lift, lowering myself on him until he disappears
inside me inch my delicious inch.
I ride him, chasing my orgasm to forget Zaid, to forget my mother.
I ride him, focusing on my body and his together rather